tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post8232003993224076061..comments2024-03-13T09:23:16.861-06:00Comments on Rubicon Days: I Don't Call Myself a Dog Mom, But I Don't Care If You DoLara Elizabethhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16661093611286883883noreply@blogger.comBlogger51125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-49356734750562272872016-01-26T20:56:14.398-07:002016-01-26T20:56:14.398-07:00Excellent post! Thanks for sticking up for those o...Excellent post! Thanks for sticking up for those of us who choose not to have human children and are proud to be called dog moms.Heartprints Petshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02396597221992834534noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-40717860970260029642015-07-08T19:47:48.826-06:002015-07-08T19:47:48.826-06:00What a well written article. I also don't call...What a well written article. I also don't call myself a pet parent or dog mom (other than a training cue that started I-dont-even-know-how), and fully respect those who do to use the terminology. I think the only reason I don't use the term or feel the way I do is partly because of the marketing surrounding it. I blame marketing ;) I generally use the term "human", and occasionally guardian. I also use owner. Honestly, like you, I feel like the dogs are family and the *personal* relationship I have with them far exceeds any term. In other words, it doesn't really matter what I call it, and I could care less what people think about the word I place to it. It just *is*. I also accept this isn't very writerly of me, but then I also don't consider myself a writer ;)<br /><br />I personally feel we have to remember that it's a term, and not a negative one or one based in slander... and therefore doesn't carry some kind of heavy burden with it. It's just a term.<br /><br />But on the other hand, I've seen dog people bristle because some of us *don't* use the term too! Which, I feel, is also going a bit too far and sort of bringing things in a circle back to where they started (I think if we're asking for respect for a term, then we should respect the terms that other people use or don't use! Just because I dislike a term doesn't mean any kind of personal offense... I just don't like a term. Probably because of too-slick marketing.)<br />Jen deHaan https://www.blogger.com/profile/09779747351354800176noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-26639391548068797122015-06-22T11:57:49.656-06:002015-06-22T11:57:49.656-06:00I love your post! Thank you for your honesty, you ...I love your post! Thank you for your honesty, you hit the nail right on the head so hard, those mommy bloggers will be hurting. Something I've learned from working with women with children is that they are control freaks. If they can't control it it's not right and I think this is what it's about. I do call myself Dolly's mom but not in her blog, I didn't like the sound of it which is one of the reasons I came up with the Lady. I not only never had children I never had the desire to have them and didn't even really know how to love and nurture my first cat properly. It's something I've had to learn how to do. Like you I am committed to their care and well being just as much as a responsible mother is to her child no matter what term we use.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00285837702766349493noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-4141123722629649242015-06-22T08:48:28.831-06:002015-06-22T08:48:28.831-06:00LOL! I love that pillow! LOL! I love that pillow! Ryan Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17246020494604168072noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-54712430430662648842015-06-22T08:36:28.809-06:002015-06-22T08:36:28.809-06:00"or maybe I've just never outgrown the ur..."or maybe I've just never outgrown the urge to do exactly what I'm told not to do"<br /><br />I am finding that I want to start calling myself a dog mom now, too, Ryan, even though I didn't before! Also, I want this pillow:<br /><br />https://www.pinterest.com/pin/322218548310080381/Lara Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16661093611286883883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-11102981502447136142015-06-22T08:31:01.159-06:002015-06-22T08:31:01.159-06:00"You don't know what love is until you ha..."You don't know what love is until you have a kid" is such a condescending statement. If someone says that to me, I infer a few things about that person and their parenting abilities, none of them complimentary. <br /><br />The blog post you refer to has actually made me embrace the pet parent terms MORE. I casually called my pets my kids on occasion, but I do it a lot more frequently since discovering how mad it makes people. Maybe it's a solidarity thing with people like Amanda and Carol, supporting them by joining them... or maybe I've just never outgrown the urge to do exactly what I'm told not to do. Either way, with the vitriol coming from the "real" parents, I'd rather join "sides" with the wonderful loving pet parents, none of whom ever try to illigitimize anyone's claim to parenthood because it makes them feel insecure. Ryan Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17246020494604168072noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-49349080891451014662015-06-22T08:27:32.595-06:002015-06-22T08:27:32.595-06:00I started reading through those comments this morn...I started reading through those comments this morning and wow - she certainly made a lot of people angry. But as you say you have to expect some backlash when being critical of something as simple as what other people choose to call themselves. I try to tread lightly as well in regards to most issues for sure. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01672825791526583489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-20551373442951628722015-06-22T01:04:15.935-06:002015-06-22T01:04:15.935-06:00I am so glad to see people putting their paw and f...I am so glad to see people putting their paw and foot down on this topic. I have blogged about it repeatedly. Until someone's name other than mine appears on my birth certificate, I have the right to call myself whatever I please. These naysayers need to pipe down. TY for blogging!FidoseofRealityhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14411371128158560753noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-79868848821388792492015-06-20T17:05:34.235-06:002015-06-20T17:05:34.235-06:00I don't understand anyone being upset. I call ...I don't understand anyone being upset. I call myself their mom and their guardian and while I've never lost a child but I do have one and when my heart/soul dog Scarlett died I was devastated utterly. If lost my daughter God forbid I can imagine it would hurt as deeply and for the rest of my life. Scarlett has been gone for over 3 years and I still cry about her some days. No one has the right to define a relationship and tell others what they can or cannot call it. We, as free human beings, get to define ourselves and our labels and whatever we want to be is no one's business. Your post here is very well written and I enjoyed reading it a lot :-)Wolff Den Presshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00017197394885017954noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-43398443103126166852015-06-19T20:56:16.592-06:002015-06-19T20:56:16.592-06:00My boy is adopted so that makes me his mom. I like...My boy is adopted so that makes me his mom. I like the term pet guardian, but have no problem with parent. Why should I? If someone loves and cares for their animals they can call themselves whatever they want! I think some people like to see themselves as a superior species and calling ourselves pet parents threatens that separateness and insults their sense of specialness. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08227549652781193119noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-20600750855827837542015-06-19T18:10:35.148-06:002015-06-19T18:10:35.148-06:00It's interesting that people get so angry. I ...It's interesting that people get so angry. I think the anger comes out of jealousy. It's almost like they are mad that some of us chose the childless life, and we live a more freeing life because of it. This is the 21st century people - get over yourselves. Gay people are getting married, transgender people are more accepted and women have careers and no children. Get. Over. It. <br />P.S - thanks for the mention! My animals are very much my kids. They aren't children, but I treat them like my children. And anyone who has a problem with it can say it to my face <3 Amanda Yantoshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11339555837009438560noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-27656548783074619852015-06-19T16:10:05.079-06:002015-06-19T16:10:05.079-06:00I think some people take life, and themselves, to ...I think some people take life, and themselves, to seriously. I sometimes refer to myself as Chester and Gretel's Mom. Never once did I mean it in the literal sense, or even close. I am not confusing dogs with human kids and, quite frankly, either is anyone else I know that refers to themselves as a Dog Mom. I could just as well have chosen to call myself their very special sparkle unicorn and it shouldn't matter to anyone else. To each their own.Jessica @ YouDidWhatWithYourWeiner.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16636058596387444739noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-26735574429345309632015-06-19T15:46:10.458-06:002015-06-19T15:46:10.458-06:00I guess some people just have to have something t...I guess some people just have to have something to argue about. I can't imagine why else she would be that upset. Personally, I come from a family that is very loosely connected. Due to family violence, legal issues, etc I'm not very close to anyone that I'm blood related to. I've always "chosen" people to be my family and never considered love to have anything to do with genetics.I call people by family pronouns even though they aren't related to me. Referring to my cats as my "children" is just an extension of that. I am not under the impression that I gave birth to them or that they hold the same place in society that humans do. I do know love, despite what that lady might think. I do something that I pray she will never have to do - love my kids with all my heart even KNOWING that one day I will have to say goodbye forever. <br /><br />-Purrs from your friends at www.PlayfulKitty.netRobinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03140345872249267901noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-24055842393877191912015-06-19T12:11:46.470-06:002015-06-19T12:11:46.470-06:00Exactly! I just read an article about life with a ...Exactly! I just read an article about life with a malinois and it kind of sounds like living with a toddler that bites all the time! Lol! zoepheedogshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05959397251791559890noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-10183944286118543592015-06-19T12:03:09.095-06:002015-06-19T12:03:09.095-06:00I don't really understand why the lady is so b...I don't really understand why the lady is so bitter. I have human kids and it's not insulting. Yes, pet kids and human kids are different and the things you go through and feel with each of them is different. I still don't think it's an insult when people call their pets their kids though. AnnStaubhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09386132460741393276noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-81295939443507729662015-06-19T11:52:05.677-06:002015-06-19T11:52:05.677-06:00I didn't read the original article, but I love...I didn't read the original article, but I love what you wrote! I'm a mother to 5 humans and I've pretty much had dogs my whole life. I didn't need my human babies to make me a complete person, but I love having them in my life. I consider myself a pet guardian, (even before I had human babies), but it doesn't cause me any distress if someone else is a pet mom. <br /><br />I think its important to realize that this doesn't have to be a mom to humans versus mom to pets fight. Some people may share her opinion, but there are plenty of us who know that the love you have isn't diminished based on the recipient's species.<br /><br />Bethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15205686314550519586noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-52096840603180474832015-06-19T09:07:07.665-06:002015-06-19T09:07:07.665-06:00There will always be someone to complain about som...There will always be someone to complain about something. Isn't that the truth? People (we) should all just learn to let people be who they are, and live our own lives. It's none of their business what you do, what you call your animals, or who you marry! Thanks for your post. I found it interesting and well-written. PeaceAnimalBlisshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09995960488200180202noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-40338219869617032102015-06-19T06:14:01.412-06:002015-06-19T06:14:01.412-06:00I couldn't be bothered to read the post that h...I couldn't be bothered to read the post that has been appearing everywhere. I don't have time for that nonsense that helps no one.<br /><br />It feels so silly to quibble over language about the ones we love in a world filled with suffering and death. <br /><br />I can only guess that the person who wrote the vitriolic post about motherhood is acting out of her own pain.Pamelahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13768027087753712341noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-74266720191816384822015-06-18T22:44:52.994-06:002015-06-18T22:44:52.994-06:00BRAVO!! Very well said. What the heck difference ...BRAVO!! Very well said. What the heck difference should it make to a human mom what we choose to do? Good grief. A. Nelson above said this so well, I wanted to quote it: "So those human mom's just need to get off of their high horses, and recognize that those of us who either can't, or choose to not have kids can still experience what it is to be a mother and the job that ensues." EXACTLY. <br />LichenCraighttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11747533558548450952noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-51247576480547794162015-06-18T20:03:53.328-06:002015-06-18T20:03:53.328-06:00This is perfect. I call myself "caretaker&qu...This is perfect. I call myself "caretaker" and "slave."Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05565043193884340476noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-64175751394783504632015-06-18T16:50:22.596-06:002015-06-18T16:50:22.596-06:00I loved this so much! I saw the article too (that ...I loved this so much! I saw the article too (that woman is nuts), and was planning to writing a response thing monday. Our views are the same!Dachshund Nolahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12050622761352753529noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-88481861163482183052015-06-18T16:36:35.653-06:002015-06-18T16:36:35.653-06:00As I read through a fraction of the 1500 comments,...As I read through a fraction of the 1500 comments, I started to feel a little bit sorry for her, but only a little. You have to expect backlash when you write something so one-sided, judgmental and harsh. I tried to tread carefully while voicing my own feelings and experience. We can always stand to stretch our compassion muscles. Lara Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16661093611286883883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-86914443325058839402015-06-18T16:33:45.950-06:002015-06-18T16:33:45.950-06:00Ha! I also have a Cat, with a capital 'C'....Ha! I also have a Cat, with a capital 'C'. Thanks for your kind words, Joanna. Lara Elizabethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16661093611286883883noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-2463848729459219812015-06-18T15:37:20.379-06:002015-06-18T15:37:20.379-06:00I love this post Lara. You are so great at articul...I love this post Lara. You are so great at articulating what do many of us are thinking. I have dogs. I have kids. And I have a Cat (for some reason my phone always changes cat to Cat, I think my kitty would approve!) They are all different. They are all loved. And they are all, 100%, members of the family. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13056679444290158190noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1943031415851623904.post-70237647306033924752015-06-18T14:04:08.476-06:002015-06-18T14:04:08.476-06:00Amen to this post - when I read that original piec...Amen to this post - when I read that original piece I was left with such a feeling of hatred & disrespect to so many. She seems bitter about raising her own children for some reason and in her mind I suppose that makes it OK to judge what words others use to describe their dogs. At the end of the day it all comes down to love.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01672825791526583489noreply@blogger.com