Enlightenment

Maybe that’s enlightenment enough: to know that there is no final resting place of the mind; no moment of smug clarity. Perhaps wisdom...is realizing how small I am, and unwise, 

and how far I have yet to go. 

 ~

Anthony Bourdain 

Softer and Sweeter: A Reactive Dog Grows Up

This blog began with the challenges of a reactive dog. Some day I'll tell you the story of when Ruby's reactivity first appeared and how I spent a lot of time blaming myself and the choices I made for it.

Today I'm here to tell you that Ruby is still - will always be - a reactive dog, but how mostly it isn't an issue anymore. It isn't an issue not because I am not constantly managing it and making decisions around Ruby's reactivity, but because it doesn't define us, and because if there is one thing you can count on, it's change. Ruby has softened and sweetened before my very eyes, daring me to be less afraid and to trust her with things that were previously out of our comfort zone.

Let me be clear: Ruby is still a maniac on the leash when she sees other dogs or bicycles, but if I time it right, I can significantly reduce the severity of her reaction by simply picking her up. Since I wrote this post, Ruby now looks to me whenever she is uncomfortable or in need of some reassurance to scoop her into my arms. I'm lucky she's small enough to do so, and I don't think it's a cheat or a sign that she's spoiled - it's simply what works for us.

Recently I took Ruby and Boca to visit our dear friend at her farm on the prairie, complete with three dogs, three cats, a herd of horses, donkeys, goats and llamas and a flock of ducks - a veritable menagerie of triggers, right? Not to mention that first we had to get there, in the car. I solved Ruby's car-barking by getting her a crate for road trips, but the unfortunate trade-off is that riding in the crate exacerbates her car sickness. I decided to compromise by leaving the mesh door unzipped so that she could come out of the crate on her own once we set off.

Ruby exited her crate by the time we reached the freeway, and soon there was a motorcycle in front of us - one of her triggers. I glanced back to confirm that yes, Ruby definitely saw the motorcycle. And didn't bark. We saw two more on our round trip - still no barking. Best of all - no puking! Boca was not thrilled to give up part of the seat and eventually curled up in the snug travel crate - an amusing sight. Four ginger dogs and one black dog romped around my friend's yard for hours and tried their luck with several disciplinarian cats. Ruby got her fill of barking at real-life horses and made a new terrier friend (a fellow Jack Russell mix with whom she exchanged hilariously spastic play-bows) all without incident. It was a glorious day for everyone. 

Another small win this month was that I was able to comb out the mats in Ruby's increasingly long Border Collie-esque pantaloon feathers (technical term). She used to be afraid of the comb, and suspicious of most grooming activities. Now she accepts nail clipping, paw massages and feather-untangling. She wags her pretty paintbrush tail more, in wide sideways sweeps. She lays upside down and makes adorable blissful grunts and implores me to scratch her armpits. These changes are evidence of the growing security she feels, and it makes my heart soar to see her breathe a little deeper, settling into her own skin and the life and routines she can feel safe within.

One of my goals for Ruby and I this summer is to take her on a solo backpacking trip. This will come with its own challenges - like swiftly scooping her up if I need to with a 30 pound pack on my back- but I believe the memories and experience it will entail outweigh the hurdles. Last night my boyfriend and I did a test-pitch of my new tent - a bright yellow, crinkly, novel object - and much to my delight and surprise, as soon as the door was unzipped, my (not so) timid little red-and-white dog climbed right in! Ruby is ready for new adventures, and a constant reminder that we are always evolving, that curiosity can overcome fear, and that who we are is never limited by who we were.

Imperfectly Perfect

One of the basic rules of the universe is that nothing is perfect. 
Perfection simply doesn't exist...without imperfection, neither you nor I would exist.

~
Stephen Hawking

The Journey That Matters

It is good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.

~

Ursula K. Le Guin

The Sweetness of Acceptance

The upside-down perspective of this picture is a perfect representation of how Ruby changed my world, and how our trust and relationship has grown over time. Recently we celebrated four years together, having adopted her in August of 2013.  Just weeks prior, my previous dogs were still alive and adopting another wasn't even a consideration, but I had decided that Ruby Pearl would be a perfect name for my next dog based on a book that I was reading that summer. Life can change in a heartbeat. When I lost both 14 year old dogs within ten days I thought I would wait a while before looking again, but the house felt unbearably empty. I perused the adoption personals. I saw that very first picture. Her name was Foxy Roxy and she looked sharp as a tack - like she might know calculus - and skeptical, like she was holding back the softest parts of herself. She looked like she could be the best kind of trouble. She is everything I first saw and so much more.
 

Losing and finding are two sides of the same coin. I lost my two old dogs and found Ruby. I lost the dream of a dog I could take everywhere (until I adopted the Queen of Chill, Boca, also thanks to Ruby). Instead, I found a dog that inspired compassion and creativity, patience and humility. Ruby gave me a deeper understanding of dog behavior and training, and thereby a deeper understanding of myself. Because of her, I started my blog, met countless other dog people and made new lasting friendships, taught her over thirty tricks, protested the sale of pet store puppies, and helped start a dog rescue. In the beginning, when Ruby's reactivity first began to surface, I was disappointed that we wouldn't be going to dog-friendly patios and participating in agility or flyball. I was frustrated that training wasn't a fast or surefire cure. It isn't that I have given up on training, but that I accept Ruby as she is and rely heavily on management. Once I did this, the frustration faded. Part of that initial disappointment was not being able to share all of her wonderful qualities, but Rubicon Days has allowed me to share her with all of you. Thank you. I'm so grateful to know there are others who stick with their challenging dogs, commit to their needs, forgive their sensitivities and recognize their strengths.

Ruby will always be a reactive dog, but over the years she has become softer, sweeter. She wags her tail all the time: slow, sweeping conversational wags and blurry animated helicopter wags where a tug toy or ball is involved. She lets me hold her upside down for armpit scratches and paw massages. She communicates with what I call her "chicken barks" in addition to a hilarious assortment of grunts and grumbles. She makes sure I get out of the shower alive. She licks my face with an impressive fervor, all the more if I dare giggle. She melts my heart with her pouty lip that is exactly the color of an earthworm. She astounds me with her intelligence. She reminds me how to play, complete with play-growls. She taught me how big love can be. I've known so many animals in my life but Ruby burns the brightest, digging as only a terrier can dig, straight to my heart. I call her Punkin' Pie (it has to be said and spelled that way). I nibble her ears and say "I'll eat you up, I love you so," from Where the Wild Things Are. I emblazoned her onto my arm for all time. I've spent these past four years trying to describe what she means to me and I still haven't quite managed but I expect I'll keep trying. I'm not the least bit embarrassed by any of it - it's who I am, because of her. More than anything, Ruby has taught me that when we feel safe and loved, we can relax, roll over, show our bellies. When we feel accepted, we can be our most beautiful selves.

In Search of Treasure

You can either be a victim of the world or an adventurer in search of treasure.  It all depends on how you view your life. ~ Paulo Coelho

Before I Was Hers

You can know an animal - or a person, for that matter - in an instant, really, 

though your understanding can go on unfolding for years.

~

Mark Doty  

Pop Your Pup Helps Fuel My Unapologetic Dog Obsession

Everyone who knows me knows that I'm obsessed with dogs - any and all dogs, to a point, but more specifically, my dogs. I could look at Ruby's adorable face all day, and since she's on my phone, computer, office bulletin board, and oh yeah, on my arm, I can and do! Boca's antics entertain me endlessly and I have no less than thirty photos of her in my favorite potcake posture, the street dog slouch. I jump at the chance to brag about Ruby's smarts and Boca's sweetness, and pity the unsuspecting person who innocently asks "what kind of dogs do you have?" since Boca's breed/rescue story alone is another tale in itself.

I still felt there was potential to level up my passion and Pop Your Pup was the key. I previously reviewed their customized t-shirts and when they approached me for another partnership I gladly agreed. They've changed their look and now offer even more options for proudly wearing the cutest dogs in the world (your own, of course) or turning them into home-gallery-ready works of art in the way of wrapped read canvases!  I mean, how awesome are these? Just in case it wasn't clear, this post has been sponsored by Pop Your Pup. 

Summer Wonder

A dog can never tell you what she knows from the smells of the world, but you know, watching her, that you know almost nothing. . .

~

Mary Oliver

The Tonic of Wildness

We need the tonic of wildness...At the same time that we are earnest to explore and learn all things, we require that all things be mysterious and unexplorable, that land and sea be indefinitely wild, unsurveyed and unfathomed by us because unfathomable. 

We can never have enough of nature.

~ 

Henry David Thoreau

Imploring Gaze

It is not that I'm so smart. But I stay with the questions much longer.

~
Albert Einstein

Ruby is continuously asking, a creature of curiosity. Her short stature means that she's always looking up, up, up, with those bright amber and grey eyes, those large inquisitive ears. She wonders what I'm doing, when will that include her, when will I pick up the caterpillar toy or say the magic four-letter word that begins with a 'W' or go upstairs so she can follow with her nose at my heels or sit on the purple sofa so she can nestle into her favorite spot in my lap. In a bigger way, she asks if I'm listening, if I love her more than yesterday, if she's taught me something important, if she brings me joy and the answer is always, always, always yes. 

Prey Drive

If I had to make up my own address for The Ginger Sisters and myself, we would reside at the edge of Hundred Rabbit Hill in Rabbitville, Colorado. When you have a Jack Russell mix who identifies strongly with her digging, hunting and chasing terrier side, this makes leashed dog walks a challenge. They've been responsible for a nerve-wracking escape, an emergency vet visit and sprinkling the sidewalk with Boca's favorite snack.

Celebrating Ruby's 3rd Birthday

Yesterday we celebrated Ruby's third birthday. I don't know her actual birthdate since she came from a (terribly dismal) shelter in Arkansas, but since I adopted her at around 7-9 months old in August of 2013, it's a fair guess. I love the number '11' and couldn't resist the echoing date. Boca's chosen birthday is May 11th, and my horse's actual birthday is April 11th. 

I was so lucky to get to spend the day home with my birthday Border Jack - my office was closed for Veteran's Day. Denver received its first real snowfall of the year it was a great day to spend equal time playing outside and cuddling up indoors.  We ran breathlessly through the undisturbed snow in a nearby field, where Ruby ran along with her head buried like a little snowplow. Later I threw Ruby's flying disc for her on the long-line - she made a few impressive mid-air catches!

The Ginger Sisters had a two course birthday dinner: first up were frozen Kongs filled with Nature's Logic sardine dinner and Only Natural Pet biscuits. After that I scrambled some eggs in coconut oil and mixed them with Stella & Chewy's Surf N Turf dinner patties and some raw goat milk. Plates were cleaned and lips were licked! Ruby seemed tired after her flying disc session, but she did not let me forget her nightly game of tug. 

I feel incredibly lucky to have such a brilliant, expressive, playful dog in my life. Ruby has taught me so much in our time together and I have her to thank for an increased understanding of dog training, dog behavior, and of course - this blog! She is the youngest dog I have adopted and I am looking forward to a deepening relationship for many years to come. Happy birthday, Ruby Pearl!

My Five Favorite Pictures of Ruby

Earlier in the week I talked about Ruby's expressiveness. Between that, her unique markings and her photogenic propensity, choosing just five favorite pictures of her was no easy task. Her personality really shines in pictures and I think that is why she has so many fans in those of you who read Rubicon Days and follow us on social media. It makes me so happy to think all of you can see her the way I do, even knowing the many ways in which she is a complicated dog.  I take pictures of her almost daily, and I never get tired of looking at them. I love being able to portray the many faces of my amazing girl. It's sometimes hard to fit Ruby's wonderfully huge ears in frame, as evidenced by my first favorite. Her always-beautiful eyes are so imploring here, but it's that little pink lip that slays me the most. This picture was taken when Boca was getting a tooth extracted and I thought Ruby was feeling a little blue in her sister's absence so I tried to cheer her up with some training and a photo shoot.

I don't have a story behind this picture, it's just gorgeous. I've always loved unusual markings, from pinto horses to dapple and merle dogs, and it's no secret that eye-patches and split-faces will catch my eye on adoption sites. Ruby is a deep thinker and I've never known a dog with such a faraway look in her eyes at times, like she's pondering the meaning of life.

Due to her reactivity, I don't get many opportunities to photograph Ruby in different outdoor settings, especially off-leash. This was a lucky day when we had the dog park to ourselves at the crack of dawn. Ruby would leap up on the rocks to wait for me to throw her flying disc. She looks so pretty in her blaze-orange harness, even if it is crooked, and she is staring at me with that trademark intensity. 

While nothing special in its lighting or composition, this is possibly my all-time number-one favorite picture of Ruby. With dirt sprinkling her muzzle and paws, she is wholly satisfied and self-assured, oozing attitude with that smug look of accomplishment. Digging is one of her greatest delights, and don't expect her to apologize for it.

This picture reminds me that Ruby looks stunning in black and white, but what I adore about it is the joy she is exuding. She was waiting for me to throw her ball, ready to pounce into a play-bow, eyes sparkling and mouth smiling. Ruby often looks fervently serious in photos so I'm thrilled when I'm able to capture her lighthearted side.

I'll continue this series with my favorite pictures of Boca and of The Ginger Sisters together. One of the best parts about having a camera perpetually on hand is the ability to collect and distill those intangible moments that make life with dogs so extraordinary.

Living With the Highly Communicative Dog

Ruby is the most vocal dog I've ever had, and also the clearest communicator. It isn't that she barks excessively (animals on T.V. not withstanding), but that she has a range of barks, whines, grunts and growls that I am still learning to interpret after more than two years together. As i read in bed last night, she was growling in her sleep and it sounded like her 'play initiating' growl rather than her 'something unfamiliar in my environment' growl which I also heard last night on our walk when she saw the silhouette of the new horseshoe pit enclosures in the dark. Was she dreaming about playing with her sister or one of her corgi friends? 

Earlier in the evening, she scratched at the coat closet door where her tug toys are kept and exclaimed with her medium-pitched, pleading bark "we haven't played yet tonight!" Some might call this 'demand barking.' I call it a Border Jack keeping me honest. There's no short-changing Ruby out of her nightly tug game. Even if she lets me slide before dinner, when 8 o'clock rolls around she is ready for the Tug-a-gator or the Kong Wubba to be liberated from their closet confines.

Some of my favorite sounds in the Ruby repertoire are her soft little 'oofs' - her closed-mouth grunt-barks, which put me in mind of a toddler reaching for something they want on a too-high counter-top. This is Ruby's imploring request, not only for food, but for the living room window to be opened so she can watch for rabbits, for her ball to be fished out from underneath the sofa, or for anything else she wants. I usually understand exactly what she means. I think it's fairly polite and irresistibly adorable. She was 'oofing' at me last night from the bed after I got out of the bath - curled up with Big Sister and the ancient black cat, she wanted the whole family together so that she could go to sleep. 

At the opposite end of the range are her shrill, excited barks that are used for the aforementioned animals on T.V., those unbearable few seconds between when she knows I'm about to open the tug toy door and when I toss the toy to her, when she sees one of the gazillion rabbits that exist solely to taunt her on our townhome complex grounds. These are not my favorite barks, high-pitched and frantic, and these are the barks to be countered with a reminder cue, "shh" or "quiet" before I will let her have the coveted toy or chase the insubordinate rabbit (on leash).

Along with her voice, Ruby's eyes and ears communicate a diverse array of emotions. In her most common state of hyper-vigilance, Ruby's foxy ears stand straight up, vibrating vertically with inquisition. When she is tired or uncertain, her ears slide to a more horizontal position and somehow look even bigger. When she is sleepy and affectionate, her ears lay straight back making her look like an entirely different dog. Sometimes one ear folds onto itself at a comical angle - I haven't quite figured that one out yet.

That brings me to Ruby's beautiful, intelligent, extraordinary eyes. 'The Look' endeared me to her Petfinder profile that spoke of a deep understanding, a piercing entreaty, and a spark of mischief.  Sometimes it feels like Ruby's amber-green eyes look straight into my soul. The intensity with which she stares at me is both flattering and unnerving. There are layers of meaning in her gaze, and I think we've only begun to scratch the surface of the potential of non-verbal communication with animals. As this article states - dogs keep the conversation going constantly, the ultimate optimists. I love learning Ruby's language, hearing what she has to say, meeting her needs and increasing our bond through call and response with all of our senses.

Happy Halloween from The Ginger Sisters!

The Most Interesting Dog In the World

 This dog. Endlessly melting my heart with that intensely intelligent gaze. 

My dad says she always gets her way. Can you blame me? 

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Foot Warmer

Overnight, we've felt the seasons change. Our evening dog walks require a jacket and the gilded light is slanting through the leaves as they turn autumnal shades of coin and clamor to the ground. One of the things I dislike about winter is that once I get chilled, it sometimes feels like I will stay frozen forever. Ruby has many self-imposed terrier responsibilities in this life and I'm grateful that she considers foot-warming one of them as we march headlong into the colder months together. 

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When A Border Jack Can't Keep Her Eyes Open

Ruby counts defying gravity among her many talents...

...but sometimes you just have to give in to a summer afternoon's alluring lullaby...

...and use your sister's butt as a pillow.

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Just the Ginger Sisters, Being Cute

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